(by Anonymous Wine Lover)
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
Do you sometimes feel stressed?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your
doctor or pharmacist about Cabernet Sauvignon!(*Disclaimer we are not advocating alcohol consumption and certainly not for minors. This article is meant as a lighthearted tongue-in-cheek piece)
Cabernet Sauvignon is the safe, natural way to feel better
and more confident. It can help ease you out of your shyness
and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to
do just about anything.
You will notice the benefits of Cabernet Sauvignon almost
immediately and, with a regimen of regular doses, you'll
overcome obstacles that prevent you from living the life you
want.
Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past. You
will discover talents you never knew you had.
Cabernet Sauvignon may not be right for everyone. Women who
are pregnant or nursing should not use it but women who
wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to
try it.
Side Effects May Include:
Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, loss of motor
control, loss of clothing, loss of money, delusions of
grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth,
and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night Strip Poker,
Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.
Warnings:
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may make you think you
are whispering when you are not.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to tell
your friends over and over again that you love them.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to think
you can sing.
The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may create the
illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster, and better
looking than most people.
Chardonnay, Scotch, Vodka, Bourbon, Tequila, and of course Beer may
be substituted for Cabernet Sauvignon, with similar results!
Please feel free to share this important information!
LIFE IS A CABERNET OLD CHUM!!To contact Paige Donner for speaking/hosting/producing paigedonner.info
For more info about Paris GOODfood+wine and a complete show lineup go to localfoodandwine.wordpress.com
And our website parisfoodandwine.net
Instagram @paigefoodwine Twitter @parisfoodwineListen to Paris GOOD food + wine on :
All photos (where noted) copyright 2017 Paige Donner
Photo Bookings FoodWine.Photography
iTunes – Paris GOODfood+wine /
Prints available by contacting http://PaigeDonner.info
No comments:
Post a Comment